Wednesday, June 3, 2020

the end of an era




As of yesterday, my maternity leave is officially over. It was the last day of school.

Initially I was worried about taking a year off work. Was it in our best interest financially? Would my decision be well-received by others? Would my friends/family members who did not have the same luxury (or desire) still respect me? Would my coworkers welcome me back with open arms after taking an entire year off, while they continued working hard for students? Did it mean that I'm not a good teacher, because I desired to stay home more than having the opportunity to positively impact the lives of 25 children? How could I possibly go back...after being off for an entire year?

There were a lot of people who told me that they were so happy for me. That I'd never regret that decision to take a year off. And let me tell you, they were right. There has not been a single day where I thought, "Man...this is tough/boring/not what I thought it'd be. I'd rather be working."

I'm thankful for this time. The past 9 months hold the majority of my most treasured moments. I'm thankful for my husband, who wholeheartedly supported my desire to spend the year at home. I'm thankful to my school district, who allowed me to take this time off while guaranteeing that I'd have a position to come back to. I'm thankful to my building principal, who supported my decision, even though it's not something she ever would've done. She's placing me back in 3rd grade next year, and I couldn't be happier. I'm thankful for my girlfriends at work, who made an effort to get together with me at least once a month (if not once a week!) to ensure that I stayed a part of the group, and wasn't forgotten about. I'm thankful to my parents, that my own mom was able to stay home with me the majority of my childhood so that I could see how important that time was. I'm thankful to all the people who seemed so genuinely happy for me when I mentioned that I was staying home this year. I'm thankful to the MOPS group at church, who gave me a place to socialize with other moms since most of my friends were working. And most of all, I'm thankful to God, for providing this opportunity for me and my baby. It has been the biggest blessing I could've ever imagined.

There were times (especially in the early winter) when I dreaded going back to work. When I thought I'd resent my future students who would be "taking away" my time with my child. I confided in a friend about how much I didn't want to go back. How I was struggling with something that was still so far away. How I found myself thinking about my dread so much, that it was stealing the joy of what time I had left at home. We prayed together and she has continued to pray over me in the months since. And my feelings have changed. While I'd never choose work over staying home with Bryson, I find myself being a little more eager to get back in the classroom. To spend time with my coworkers, who are some of my best friends. To get back to the work I know I've been called to do.

It's going to be hard, especially at first. I'll probably cry when I drop him off for my first day of work. He and I will never have this kind of freedom again--the freedom to just be mom and son, with no other responsibilities other than playing, housework, and errands. There will always be some kind of schoolwork that could/needs to be done. But I've made the decision to manage my time a bit more wisely while at work, so that I can make the most of my afternoons, evenings, weekends, and school breaks. He will have fun in daycare and make lots of new little buddies. It will be good for him to be away from me for awhile each day.

For the next 2 months, I'll balance my time between Bryson and preparing for the school year ahead (with him getting much more of my time and energy than schoolwork, of course!) We'll spend our days enjoying summer vacation and the last bit of time we have left before August rolls around.

He'll never remember the time I was home with him for his first 9 months. But I will. And I'll be forever grateful for morning snuggles in our jammies, mid-week visits with grandparents, play dates with friends, Target runs with his little carseat in the cart, being okay with getting up multiple times a night because I didn't have to get up early work in the morning, sending pictures/videos to Ty at work, enjoying lunch time together every day, and witnessing all his sweet milestones so far.

Lord, thank you. Thank you so much. My soul needed this extra time with him. And thank you for also allowing me to recharge my teacher batteries in the process.

xoxo, wife (& mommy)

Tuesday, June 2, 2020

the catch-up post

Just to warn you, it'll be a long one. I wanted to catch up and document all of the things that have happened in the last month since I had posted. Covid definitely helps with that, because it cuts down on the things we can go and do, but there are still a lot of pictures, because my kid is cute.

Here we go:


Bryson "helped" me pack up the rest of the old house.






Look at those little teeth!

We had a MOVING photo shoot, of course.




Spent time at my mom and dad's house while we had 17 house showings in 2.5 days. 

We're still worshiping at home for the time being. This was taken during one of our church's live streams.

We celebrated Mother's Day! I knew I'd enjoy being a mom...but it's so much more than I'd ever imagined it would be.


More packing...and the most perfect little faux-hawk I've ever seen. Since this picture was taken about 2 or 3 weeks ago, his hair has grown enough that it's finally starting to lay down. I'm so sad!

We took Bryson to see his new room at the new house!


Oh man...that mess! But look at how good Bryson has gotten at sitting up on his own!

We celebrated our 10th anniversary by packing haha!


Getting used to the new house!

My mom painted this coffee table for us, and Bubba loves to lay under it! He's feeling right at home here. His only complaint is that he can no longer run down to the basement when we run the vacuum cleaner.

Is it even 2020 if you don't have a mask-selfie?



Ty got my craft area set up right away down in the basement. I was shocked and surprised, because I thought it was all going to have to be in my office. My first project here was putting our address on the mailbox! (And a little surprise on the inside!)




Memorial Day weekend was dedicated to family. Ty's brother and his family came into town and we spent the majority of the weekend with them. They came to see the new house, and then we went over for a bonfire, then back the next day. It was definitely the most stimulation Bryson has had in a few months! I was surprised at how well he did with all the people, especially after being cooped up at home with just us for so long.





Lydia insisted on feeding Bryson his lunch. It was possibly the messiest meal he's had, but she eventually got the hang of it. She even helped change a diaper!

After a LONG debacle with Lowe's our washer and dryer were delivered. I LOVE how big the drums are...we can do massive loads!


This was the first time that Ty's cousin Tenley, who has Down Syndrome, held Bryson. As you can tell from our faces, this made Ty and I so happy! Tenley loves Bryson so much!







Bryson loves his uncle Jason! 





The next day, Lydia did my nails.



He also loves his Aunt Tara!





This kid is officially rolling all over the place.


And he's been fighting his morning nap lately, which means I get more snuggles because he'll sleep if I'm holding him. 

He also sleeps with his butt in the air now. Which is very cute, if you ask me.







And just like that, my maternity leave is officially over and I'm writing my Meet the Teacher letter that will get mailed out to my new students in a couple weeks. Time flies!

If you're still here...you da REAL MVP! I think that pretty much catches us up on the last month.

xoxo, wife (& mommy)