Please hold your applause til the end, but I have to announce that the Stink Bug Whisperer has had a success!
Okay, so it was one time, and I'M the self-proclaimed Stink Bug Whisperer. But I was pretty pumped about it. We were sitting at the kitchen table. Ty was working on the computer, and I was sitting by him, doodling and talking on the phone. Our cat jumped up on the table round about the time I noticed a huge bug land on the chandelier above the kitchen table. I quickly hung up with my mom and asked MACHO HUSBAND-MAN, to take care of this little problem. He declined. So I decided to take fate into my own hands. I grabbed a paper towel, and tried to get this big old bug. FYI: These suckers fly. Every time I would get my paper towel near him, he'd fly off toward me, sending me into a fit of screams and shakes. (You know, the "Eeek! There might be a bug on me!" thing.) MACHO HUSBAND-MAN watched, then told me to get the sweeper, and we'd suck him up. But the Stink Bug Whisperer was determined to complete the job without any magical electrical appliance. So I kept at it....and at it....and at it. And you know what? Finally, I got that dang stink bug in my paper towel, and flung him (paper towel and all) outside onto the deck. I went out to get the paper towel, and of course, MACHO HUSBAND-MAN had to be stupid and tell me that the stink bug flew and landed on my back.
But between you and me, I think MACHO HUSBAND-MAN was a little jealous that the Stink Bug Whisperer was able to perform this feat without the help of his precious little sweeper! HeHeHe!