the other day the "fever" struck.

Baby Fever, that is.

I know I've blogged at least a few times before about how we want to wait a long while before having any kids.

We had originally said three years after marriage.

Well guess what?

We're coming up on three years in May.

Woah.

We've since decided to hold off a little longer :)

 

But that doesn't mean that I don't get the itch for a little baby of my own every once in awhile.

And that itch came a'scratching during church the other day.

It probably had something to do with the fact that I spent the weekend hanging out with my 7 month old niece.

Or the fact that I got to hold my cousin-in-law's adorable, sleeping newborn during that time too.

But I was watching a new mom at church Sunday, holding her itty bitty one, and all I could do was stare.

For the first time EVER...I actually wanted one of my own.

Like actually wished I was having a baby.

Or already had one...

 

 

I have to admit that I was taken aback by this desire to have a baby.

I've always thought I wanted kids eventually,

but I've never wanted one quite as badly as I did at that moment.

Ty even noticed that I was staring, and I told him that the fever had hit me.

You should've seen the look on his face!

 

I honestly felt that at that moment, if my job wasn't so demanding of my time and energy, I would've said, "Let's do it. Let's start a family."

 

But then I left church.

I played my music as loud as I wanted.

I went to the grocery store where I saw countless screaming children being dragged behind mothers as they tried to get groceries for the week.

I came home and started laundry, complaining in my head about how much laundry JUST THE TWO OF US go through in a week.

I ate lunch in peace while watching whatever I wanted to on tv.

Then I lounged on the couch for a peaceful Sunday afternoon.

I thought to the following day of work, and the 25 little lovlies that would be waiting there for me.

And then the fever subsided.

 Quickly.

 

I know I'm still not ready. WE'RE still not ready.

And that's ok, because we're still young.

But it's nice to know that I do have some kind of maternal clock that's ticking.

I was starting to wonder if I really was ever going to ACTUALLY want kids, or if it was just something I said because I thought I was supposed to want them.

Now I know that when the time is right for both of us, I really do have that desire deep down.

Here's to hoping that desire stays buried deep down for a couple more years :)

 

xoxo, wife.